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Sunday, 19 June 2016

CAMP EXPERIENCE

Camp Experience 
Date:13-5-16

Do you think that spotLight is a dangerous game. If you think it's not then you are terribly wrong.  

Camp was a great experience. We did Bear Grylls, orienteering and more. But spotlight was one of the most bravest moments of camp.

It was a  dark and chilly night at Hanmer Forest Camp. We had finally earned the privilege to play SPOTLIGHT. The first thing we needed to do was to wait eagerly for Kiri to get all of the equipment we needed. After that we lined up anxiously busting to play. Then Kiri shouted at the top of her lungs “On your mark get set GO!!” we all started darting to the best, but not safest hiding spot behind a big tree near the playground. That's where we go to win spotlight
At that moment I tried to crawl across to the playground. But that didn't work. I tried again by running as fast as I could. I MADE IT.  I shouted so the whole world could hear me. Without a warning...I fell Over. The pain was EXCRUCIATING!!!!!! I rolled up my pants and realised that my knee was swollen up like a balloon. 
After a few minutes Miss Virtue came running over and carried me over to some chairs and I realized that there was some other people who were injured from the dangerous game of spotlight. 

Having courage and being brave helped me in this crazy game of spotlight. Because I was brave, hoping my knee would get a lot better, and having courage, this helped me when I believed in myself.

My Writing Reflection…
In my writing I have…
a simile (I fell Over the pain was EXCRUCIATING!!!!!! I rolled up my pants and realised that my knee was swollen up like a balloon.) 
I used a dictionary for more interesting words e.g then changed into suddenly 
A hyperbole ( I fell Over the pain was EXCRUCIATING!!!!!! ) 
Strong verb ( darting )
I’am going to work on improving…
Language features
Understanding when to use a comma and when to use a full stop.

By Lulu 

1 comment:

  1. Your writing was very descriptive e.g the pain was excruciating. I had an image in my head when you said the kids darted to hiding spots. Good job

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